A healing hand.

Posted on Mon Apr 6th, 2026 @ 10:16pm by Commander Milani & Commodore Finchley Kerr & Captain Kevin, Lord Kilbane of Sanquhar

Mission: Delivering on the undeliverable.
Location: USS Thall, Kilbane's quarters/holodeck
Timeline: Current.

The last mission hadn't been a particularly long one, but it had been rather telling on Kilbane's strength and his will. After the debriefing the Commodore had given them, he'd told those who had been involved to get some rest and recuperation and Kilbane had come straight back to his quarters. After a long hot shower, he found himself wrapped in a large towel, sitting on his sofa with a large scotch in his hand.

He leaned back, allowing his thoughts to drift but they kept coming back to the same thing...Milani. He still found it hard to comprehend how they were now intertwined, the gist if it he got, but the complexities of how it was happening eluded him. Still, he hadn't really been able to put her out of his mind ever since they'd got back to the ship, and there was something else, a warm, pleasant feeling when he did think about her, something he hadn't felt in quite some time.

Thinking back to the mission, he wasn't sure if it had been circumstances that had brought them closer together, or whether it was that they now shared a part of each other. He guessed there would only be one way for him to find out, and that was to ask her.

Tapping his COMM badge he said, "Kilbane to Milani, are you free for an hour or so?"

Milani was just coming out of the shower, she preferred a water shower as standing under the cascading water helped her order her thoughts. she had already spoken to an Vulcan member of the crew about having some meditation lessons. When Kilbane called she did not really know what to do. Fact was she was scared, not a feeling she was used to having but now, she was not sure of herself, of anything she felt so conflicted. Was she in love with him, if so why? yes she had always been attracted to him but his breakup with Shon had shaken him to his core, Milani could feel the pain he felt, still felt. "Yes, I am just stepping out of the shower, give me a few minutes."

In the few minutes she dried herself. As she was on R and R she wore her blonde hair loose the curls cascading down her back. A blue Tholian silk shirt and white slacks finished the outfit. As always other than on duty she went barefoot. Ten minutes later she was at his door and pressed the chime.

Kilbane, now dressed himself in light trousers, a form fitting white t-shirt and loafers, turned to the door, "Come in."

As the doors opened, he saw the vision of loveliness standing before him and his mouth fell open slightly, Recovering himself, he quickly said "Please Milani, come in and have a sea...", then he noticed she was barefoot. "Is it a rule that Betazoids don't put anything on their feet when off duty?" he asked laughingly.

She smiled glad to see him. "No not really, it's just me. She looked around and sat down pulling her legs underneath her. "Betazoids tend to have a lot of foot problems when they are older and I never have a problem with cold feet," she laughed. "So, how are you, I know you can be a coiled spring inside...." I'm sorry." she apologised. "It's just I know things you feel sometimes."

"I didn't know that, every day's a school day" Kilbane replied, smiling. "As for me, I'm not really sure, on the one hand I'm glad to be back onboard the ship, and also knowing it's not lying in pieces on that planets surface, but on the other hand, feeling kind of foolish that we were tricked with some kind of mind trick used by Alt and his people. Oh don't get me wrong, that 'quest' we were on was something out of the ordinary, totally unexpected, and dare I say it very exciting, but it's also thrown up something extraordinary, and you've just touched on it, we now know some of the things the other is feeling. There's no need for you to apologise, you're quite right in what you said, I can be a little tightly wound...in fact I can be very tightly wound sometimes, it depends on the situation. I have a rather delicate question, actually it's two questions really...before this 'partial shared feelings thing', how would you say you felt about me, and, since the 'partially shared feelings thing', how do you feel about me now?"

He almost stepped forward towards Milani, wanting to take her hand, but he hesitated and instead walked over and sat in a chair across his coffee table from her.

She sighed, "I knew you were going to ask me this so, I will be truthful. I have always been aware of you, your power and inner strength. I was attracted to you but...you were Shons, and.." she paused, "then you were not. I could feel your hurt, anger and pain from across the ship but, as much as I wanted to help I knew you would not want me to. Truthfully I wanted to comfort you and now I know some of your inner thoughts and......" Milani stood, negotiated the coffee table and knelt down. Putting her hands on his knees she shivered. "I want to know you, all of you body and soul."

Kilbane looked down at Milani's hands on his knees, then back up to her face. His body had stiffened at the mention of 'being Shons', and an anger rose up inside him, then as quickly as it had risen, it left him. "There's a line that should never be crossed" he said to Milani, "and I crossed it with her. I gave Shon everything that I had, and I got burned. It's taken some time, but I've realised that what happened was partly my fault, I allowed myself to believe she felt the same way about me, whereas in reality part of her was still with the Commodore. It was only when it was to late that I realised that and well...you've been witness to what happened with me."

He wanted to reach out to her, touch her hands, touch her face, but a fear inside stopped him doing so. "Milani, you're a beautiful woman, and I would be lying if I said that I don't want a relationship with you, one which you've said, knowing each other body and soul...but I can't just jump into that kind of relationship again for fear of being rejected again. I'm still a little guarded, we don't know each other very well, but, I do want to get to know you very well, so I have an idea, will you hear me out?"

Milani was conflicted as she realised she would be hurting Karadis but she felt something, immeasurable for Kilbane, something visceral. she sat back. "I'm listening?" she said.

"I have a holodeck programme that keeps me grounded, one that helps me when I'm feeling like things are getting to much for me, but also one that gives you an insight into my background and who I am, where I've come from and what my background is" Kilbane began, "would you be willing to allow me to show it to you?"

Milani smiled, "I know it involves the glens and mountains, the bracken and the heather and some very interesting people, remember I know your soul." She smiled and took his hand, "then let us begin this adventure and see where it takes us," she said.

Kilbane held Milani's hand and gently pulled her up onto her feet as he replied, "Knowing is one thing, witnessing and becoming a part of it is another. They say beauty is the eye of the beholder, I believe that when you see it, you'll understand why it means so much to me."

He led them from his quarters to the nearest holodeck, and once there he said, "Computer, initiate Kilbane programme one, place setting half a mile from the castle, beside the Lochy stream."

==^==Programme initiated, enter when ready==^== the computer replied.

Kilbane stepped towards the doors and they began opening. Then he stopped and stepped aside, "You first my lady" he said with a bow.

Milani dropped to her knee in a perfect curtsey. "One needs a gown for that." she said smiling as she entered the holodeck. Immediately she smelt and tasted the heather on the wind. "I feel as though I am home " she whispered to herself as she walked onto the coarse grass of the glen. She turned waiting for him to enter. "I want to see our ho...I mean your home?" she had the grace to blush and, turning she faced the wind as it peeled her hair away from her shoulders streaming in the wind. "Bracing I'd say" she called as she began to run up the hill.

Kilbane stepped into the holodeck, and saw the familiar surroundings. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, it was good to see it again, even if it was just a reconstruction. He watched as Milani ran up the hill, and he began running after her, finally catching up with her. When they'd reached the brow of the slope, he pointed towards the building in the distance, "That's it, that's castle Sanquhar, my ancestral home."

Milani laughed, “it’s just as I remember it, come on, let’s go see the horses….” She pulled his arm, “pleaseee.”

Kilbane looked at Milani, thinking how she could possibly remember it, then he remembered about their partial shared feelings and memories.

"Yes, yes ok, we can go and see the horses, but first we need to go to the castle and change" he said, "remember, this is a period time, early eighteen hundreds, I prefer that period to modern day, things were so much simpler."

Milani calmed down and took his hand as the moved around the gorse. “How long has it been since you saw the real place?” She asked thoughtfully.

Kilbane had to think, "Well, let me see...it must be...ten years give or take", and he looked a little wistful, "it's still as beautiful as this recreation, but there's also a lot of modern mod cons in it. That's why I like to be in this time period, simplicity of life, nothing but pitting your own wits against the elements."

He laughed as he began swinging Milani's hand as they walked, "I think it may take you a bit to get used to it, nothings handed to you on a plate, except food or something to drink that is."

It took them about twenty minutes of idle walking to reach the castle, and on entering it they were met by a rather serious looking man. "Ah, Harris, good. This is Lady Milani, can you see to it that Mrs Shepherd takes her up to the Kelloholm suite, she'll need to be fitted out for riding."

"Yes your Lordship, I'll see to it straight away, if her Ladyship and yourself will excuse me" Harris answered, moving off.

Milani was taken up a stunningly polished wooden staircase onto an upstairs floor covered in rugs that seemed of an age. An elderly lady stood there waiting. "Good morning Mrs Shepherd, how is your rheumatism?" She huffed and puffed and said something about telling tales. "It's not too bad Ma'am thank you." she said as she opened a large wardrobe. "Blue I think," she said as she withdrew a long, side bustled blue velvet riding dress. Milani took her uniform off and was dressed in the undergarments of the period then the dress over her head which was laced up through the back accentuating her bust. "My you are tall Maam," Mrs Shepherd said as she hustled Milani to the dressing table and began to comb her hair pinning it up and allowing a softness round her face. Finally she offered her some facial colour. "I do not wear anything on my face Mrs Shepherd." Milani added and the old woman nodded pleased. Finally a darker blue cloak was fastened around her shoulders and pinned with the badge of the house. Milani touched it softly. "I always loved this." she whispered. finally she put on some soft dark leather riding boots.

Mrs Shepherd looked at her. "Very fine Milady." she smiled, "you will look after the Master won't you Maam?" she looked worried, "He has been ...." she searched for the word, "Unhappy of late."

"Mrs Shepherd my only need is to make him happy." Tears welled up within her, she knew so much yet so little about him. She stood as Mrs Shepherd led her downstairs into what looked like a great hall with a large fire at one end with a settle and some chairs. Milani stood looking at the shields and weapons that adorned the walls.

"Weapons and defensive armour from every battle my family has fought in over the last five hundred years" Kilbane said as he entered the great hall and walked over to Milani. He pointed at a particular poleaxe, "That was used by Alan Kilbane in the Border wars, it was said he led the charge from the front and killed seven men and broke through their enemy's lines, causing them to panic and retreat. That retreat turned into a route and Alan and his men saw them off the field, bringing stability to this area for years."

He became contemplative, "Makes you wonder what went through their minds when he led the charge, knowing he could be going to his death, to say he had courage feels like an understatement."

Milani walked up and touched the hilt of a sword, suddenly swaying she became aware of men all around her, hacking with their blades, defending and thrusting forward a war cry ringing in her ears. She stepped back, pale. "It's so vicious, kill or be killed, no quarter. It must take a particular kind of courage." she looked at Kilbane, "the same strength and lust runs through you," she said softly.

Kilbane walked forward and gently took Milani's hands in his, "I'm not what you'd call a historian per say, but from what I've gathered looking through the family records, the Kilbane family have had their fair share of military service one way or another. However, we're not here to talk about that, we're here so you can see the things I hold very dear to my heart, and not all of them are made of stone or metal."

He raised Milani's hands up and kissed the back of the right one then the left, "Some of them are flesh and blood...they're called horses!" he laughed, and stood back, "Shall we away to the stables M'lady Milani, find out what steed awaits you?"

Milani smiled, "lead the way your Lordship," she said. she was an excellent rider taking part in the 'embellishment' on Betazed from an early age. The stables were clean and well appointed and the smell was of fresh straw and horse. Immediately she noted a horse as black as midnight knocking at his stable door and tossing his head. "He is beautiful," she said "and looks as though he has an attitude. May I ride him or is he yours?" she asked looking at him. She was finding she could not get enough of him.

Kilbane smiled at Milani, "If that is the horse you wish to ride, them who am I to say no" he said.

"Your Grace" the stable hand said, looking at Kilbane, "No lady has ever ridden Thunder, he's very powerful and needs a firm hand, forgive my impudence in asking, but do you think it's safe for Lady Milani to take him out?"

Kilbane looked at Thunder, then at Milani, then back to Thunder again. Turning back to the stable hand he answered, "If Lady Milani believes she can control him, then I'm happy for her to do so."

He himself had chosen a horse of similar size to Thunder, perhaps a hand or so shorter, and once helped up onto the saddle, he looked at Milani and said, "Once you're ready, let's head out."

"I don't normally ride side saddle." she said as she jumped down and undid the girth giving the saddle to the stable hand. "this girth needs treating with saddle leather, good long strokes to work it in, this girth is not supple. No no don't worry about a saddle," she said as he hurried to find an astride one. "I will ride bareback." she stood back, took the measure of Thunder and jumped up hitching her skirt as she did so. "There" she said as the horse became skittish. "Hey there" she said gently caressing the horses neck. He instantly became quieter. "right then," she smiled at Kilbane. "by the way do you prefer Kevin, or Kilbane?" she asked smiling.

Kilbane smiled at the fact Milani had done away with the side saddle and had gone instead for riding the large horse, Thunder, bareback. He began laughing loudly at her hitching up her skirt as she ran on jumped up on it's back. "I do declare that's one of the funniest things I've seen in a while!"

Waiting till Milani was settled, he answered her question, "To be honest, nobody has called me Kevin in quite some time, so that would be very nice, thank you. Now, we have a choice, we can either ride along the river which is a lovely trek, or, we can head into up over the fields and down into the village where we can have lunch at the Inn. I have no preference as I've done both, but I'm happy with whatever you choose."

"It's all in the legs." Milani said as Thunder danced. "I am happy just to be with you Kevin but lunch sounds good," Thunder reared and bucked. "But first we need a good gallop" Milani called halfway out of the stable yard.

Kilbane kicked his horse into action and galloped after Milani and Thunder out of the stable. As they exited the yard, he yelled to Milani to veer left and up the hill, soon they were in a race to see who got there first. He laughed the true laugh of someone who hadn't done so in a long time, his cares fell away and he was truly happy for the first time in a very long time. Now neck and neck with Milani, he glanced across to her and called out, "Is that all you've got old woman, I thought you knew how to race!"

Milani smiled, leant forward and whispered in Thunder's ear. He leapt forward increasing the space he covered, his nostrils flaring and the stride meeting Kevin's horse. Milani laughed into the wind her long hair finally falling out of the carefully engineered masterpiece Mrs Shepherd had created. She let go of her reins guiding Thunder with her legs at one with him then, Thunder tripped and fell rolling over on Milani. He jumped up and, thankfully not injured nuzzled her as she moved. She sat up her nose bloody and tested her limbs. Standing she looked at the mud covering her legs and began to laugh.

Kilbane quickly caught up with them and jumped down from his horse and rushed to Milani, "Are you ok, are you injured, if so, how badly, how painful is it?" he asked.

"Oh no I am fine Kevin" she said dusting herself down. I was more worried about Thunder, the pair of us have..." she picked up the reins of the now grazing horse...."have developed an understanding. I think we will do very well. Shall we walk a little? I would like to hear more about you. When you were young...and what brought you to the Thall?"

Kilbane nodded and walked back to his own horse and took hold of the reigns, and walking back to Milani and Thunder he offered for the tom begin walking. It had been a very very long time since he'd spoken about himself, and if he was honest, it wasn't the easiest of subjects for him to share.

"Well, my childhood was spent mostly learning to help my Father run the estate" he began, "As the oldest child it would fall to me to inherit the title and land when my Father passed away. It's not as grandiose as you'd imagine it to be, as heir apparent there's a lot of responsibility placed one's self to live up to my Fathers image. Schooling was fine, I passed my exams fairly easily, but becoming the person my family needed me to be to carry on the lineage was a lot harder. You see, my Father was a Duke, 'I' as his eldest child and next in line to the title then became the Marquess, not something I was particularly bothered about as my thoughts and desires lay elsewhere, I wanted to join Starfleet and become an explorer. Unfortunately my Father passed away when I had just turned eighteen and so as an adult, I automatically inherited his land and title, thus putting a halt to my dreams of signing up. However, I came to an understanding with my Mother and other siblings, I would take a 'sabbatical' and travel whilst my brother took on temporary charge of the Sanquhar title and estate. That was ten years ago, and that's partially why I haven't been back to the real family home in a long time, if I did return, I'd have to take over again and I don't want that, I want to do what I'm doing because I'm good at it. Now, as to what brought me to the Thall, That's a conversation for another day, I really don't want to think about that right now. What about you, what's your story, and how did you end up in this little slice of paradise?"

Milani looked around at the wind ruffling the tops of the pines, the smell of the heather and the taste of rain on the wind. "You know I could get used to living here," she said. "even though this is the holodeck it feels more real than the decks of the Thall." She smoothed her skirts as she held Thunder's reins. "Me, oh I had a very privileged upbringing, the best schools, good friends but there always seemed to be something missing. I had vivid dreams, nightmares, something most Betazoids do not have in mainstream life. I found when I left Betazed these stopped so I found myself staying away more and more.

I lost touch with family and friends and decided to try to join Starfleet. then my parents let me know that they had found a match for me. One of the minor princes, they gave me an ultimatum, go home and marry or I would be cut off from the family." For a moment she was silent, "to be honest Kevin it was not a difficult decision and I joined Starfleet. I was supposed to go down the usual route of a Counsellor but the Ursula wars persuaded me to go down the Command route. The FO on my first ship was a mentor to me until she was killed by the Borg at Wolf 359." Milani sighed. "then I began to have the nightmares once again but discovered that they were telling me there was something in the minds of others." She looked at him, "I often know what is going to happen, oh not in the sense of it but as though I was looking through smoke, everything is nebulous and I have to meditate, work through it." she stood brushing the grass from her dress. "Take me to this inn you mentioned, one thing you will find out about me is that I am always ravenous. "She smiled a bright smile.

Kevin had never known such beauty lay within one person, both outside and within. Though he'd served with Milani only a short while, he found himself more and more in love with her each moment that passed. Outer beauty for him was one thing, but to find a soul mate had eluded him this far in his life and now...now he believed he'd truly found one in the vision of loveliness that stood before him smiling that wonderful smile. He shook his head, realising he'd been staring at her for more than a few seconds, "Yes...yes...the inn..." he stumbled out, "It's not much when you look at it, but the company is good and food is always delicious, prepared by Hamish and his wife Maggie themselves. Their family has had the inn and served the village for over two hundred years, and truth be told, they're like family to mine. Back in the real village, their descendants still own and run it, my family still goes there for dinner twice a week and we all celebrate Christmas and New Year together."

It didn't take long for them to walk the horses down into the village. When they arrived, Kevin guided them to tom the inn's stables and spoke with the head stable hand to see that their horses were watered, fed, washed and brushed. Once that was done he led Milani to the front of the inn and opened the door for her to go in first. Once they were inside, a cacophony of talking and laughter filled the air, but stopped at the sight of the beauty who now stood before them. Kevin walked in after Milani and came out from behind her and saw the faces of the people already inside, "Gods blessing on all here!" he called out. Suddenly a cheer went up and cries of "God bless you M'lord and Lady" and "Here's to your good health M'lord and Lady."

Turning to the bar, Kevin said, "Hamish, refill all the glasses and tankards of all here and have one for you and Maggie as well."

Another cheer went up and then the talking and laughter commenced again. Hamish came out from behind the bar and greeted Kevin with a huge bear hug, "It's good to see you again M'lord, it's been a while."

Once released from the bear hug, Kevin smiled at the mountain of a man and replied, "It's just Kevin to you and Maggie, Hamish. You've known me since I was a new born and always looked out for me as I grew up."

"Aye, and a tear away you were as well!" Hamish answered, slapping Kevin on his upper arm. It was then that he saw Milani, and he bowed, "Sorry M'Lady, I didn't see you there, I'm Hamish, the innkeeper, and that's my wife and head cook Maggie" he pointed to his wife. She in turn curtsied then went back to refilling the glasses and tankards of those at the tables. "Will you be stopping for something to eat and drink M'lo...Kevin, and..." he didn't know how to address Milani.

Kevin saved the moment by intervening, "Hamish, may I introduce to you the Lady Milani."

Hamish reached out one big paw of a hand and took Milani's in his and kissed the back of it, "It's an honour and privilege to have you here in our humble establishment Lady Milani, please, come and take a seat at the table by the fire, it's the best in the house."

"Ok you big rogue, less of the charm and yes, we'll be stopping to have something to eat and drink" Kevin replied, taking Milani's hand out of Hamish's and holding it in his, "What's Maggie cooked today?"

Hamish placed a hand on Kevin's shoulder, "Nothing but the best, fresh salmon, caught this morning, and vegetables Kevin. Have a seat both of you and I'll bring two plates out along with some wine." He walked off and Kevin smiled after him, "He's a real charmer that one, but I do have to say that a more reliable friend I've not met in this village."

He looked at Milani and somehow, with the fire in the background surrounding her outline, he believed she looked more beautiful than ever. "So, what do you think?" he asked her as he pulled a chair out for her to sit down on.

She clapped her hands, "this is wonderful Kevin, these people really love you..." for a moment her eyes clouded over and her vision hardened. "I can hear people on the ship are talking about us....." she looked back at him and smiled. "I could live this life forever, perhaps one day you may take me to the real place. Ooh thank you," she said as a steaming dish of salmon and fresh vegetables was laid before her. She touched the inn owners arm, "please call me Milani, you have a wonderful place here, I envy you." she said. "Let's eat Kevin I'm starving." she laughed, "one thing you will learn about me is I am always hungry."

Hamish looked at Kevin, he'd never had someone of noble standard allow them to call them by their first name only. Kevin in turn smiled and nodded his head so Hamish was happy to oblige, "Thank you...Milani, it's very kind of you to say so. If you need seconds you only need ask." At that point, Maggie arrived at the table with some ale and two tankards. Laying them down, she curtsied to them both and withdrew.

Kevin began tucking into his food, it was delicious as always, the salmon dressed in a wonderful sauce, the vegetables cooked to perfection. He looked over at Milani, "I wouldn't worry about people talking about us, let them, I'm just so happy to be with you, and yes, hopefully one day we can visit the actual Castle Sanquhar, I'd love to show you around it and also the area surrounding it. Tell me, does Batazed have a similar set up with the families, as in, do you have nobility?"

Milani stopped eating for a moment her vision far away, then she took a bite of salmon. "Yes, yes I am, I am or rather was the first daughter of Prince Tamon heir to the throne of Betazed." she sighed and looked down. My life was destined for me before I was born. You see Kevin I was born with the acute gift of....well it means that when I bond with someone I become the person they want me to be, for life, never being myself, living my own life, having my own thoughts." She carried on eating, "Mmm this is good Hamish!" she shouted towards the innkeeper.

Hamish smiled and bowed, "I'll let Maggie know what you said, we both prepared the food."

"I was betrothed before I was born when it was known I had this special gift, to Adin the king of the third moon. He was already fifty when I was twenty so...I ran away, ran away to Earth and Starfleet. I wanted to be my own soul, live my life for myself, find my own mate. So, I am exiled, I have no contact with my family and am under an order of death if I return." she took a deep draught of the ale and looked at him. "Kevin I knew you were different from the first moment we met, there was no evidence that I could imprint on you although I 'feel' things about you and with you, it's very complicated. More so that now there is an execution order out on me."

Kevin sat and listened intently to what Milani said, and when she finished he replied, "I'm sorry to hear that you were treated in such a way Milani, I completely understand why you'd not want to be, what for all intents and purposes, the 'little lady'. I believe you made the right decision, to run away, you should be able to be yourself and be the one who guides their own destiny, it's free will. As for me being different, and though you couldn't quite fathom it, we have very similar life stories, so in effect, we're basically like two pea's in a pod as the saying goes. I'm heartily sorry that you're unable to go home for fear of execution, to me, it's your families loss, not yours. Me, well, I 'can' go home, but I don't want to, as I said, I have no desire to take over the running of my Fathers estates and holdings. There is something else though, and this is where the Commodore comes into this, the life I have here on the Thall isn't of my choosing, neither is it the Commodores...it's a punishment for something that we did that wasn't our fault, but SFIHQ won't change their minds...yet. However, enough of our pasts, let's think about the here and now, how much we enjoy each others company, the surroundings we find ourselves in and the people in it. Tell you what, I know that Hamish and Maggie have a secret still, one the tax collectors know nothing about, why don't we try and persuade our hosts to let us see it and sample the merchandise" he smiled.

Milani finished up her meal her plate clean, wiped the corners of her mouth. “Kevin” she said as her warm hand found his under the table. “Lead on.”

Kevin's skin tingled at her touch, and his heart leaped, he'd never been so happy as this moment in time. True, he'd been attracted to Milani from her first appearance on the ship, but he never thought in a thousand years he'd be able to be romantically involved with her, she was out of his class by a long long way. Yet here they were, a couple of missions down the line, many arguments and laughs later, sitting holding hands and being together not only physically, but emotionally as well. Letting her hand go, he stood up and walked round the table to stand behind Milani to await her getting up so he could pull it out and allow her to walk towards the bar. As they moved towards it, he took hold of her hand again and called to Hamish, "Now then Hamish, word has it you have a...certain side business that you're keeping quiet about. Milani and I would be most interested to 'sample' this product you make so as to see whether or not we may purchase some of it."

Hamish looked at Kevin with a child like innocence and replied, "M'lord, I devastated that you would think that a man such as myself would have such a side business on your land."

Kevin looked at him with mirth in his eyes, "Is that what you say to the tax inspectors when they come round here and ask you?"

Hamish grinned, "Aye, and they buy into it as well. I hope you don't mind your Grace, it's just a small still, and I only sell it to certain clientele."

"You mean if they have money to pay for it" Kevin replied.

"Aye, that's right, there's no tick here" Hamish said laughing loudly, "I would be honoured if you'd sample it and give me your thoughts, it's this way."

He offered for Kevin and Milani to come through the bar and out the back of the inn towards a small wooded area. There, well camouflaged, was a small hut with a stove pipe out the top, whisps rising up from the top. He led them inside and showed them the still, "I have a batch that's been ready for about a month, so should be good enough for you to try." He brought over a bottle, placed three glasses on a table and poured a generous amount into the glasses. Handing one to Milani, and then Kevin, he raised his own and said, "Here's to the both of you, happiness and long life together, Sláinte."

Kevin replied with the same "Sláinte" toast and upended his glass. The smooth whisky taste warmed on the way down and he closed his eyes in appreciation of what Hamish had created in his still, "Wonderful Hamish, simply wonderful." He turned to look at Milani, "What do you think Milani?"

Milani was still sniffing hers taking it slowly. As Kevin asked her what it tasted like she upended the glass and let it slip down. It had a flavour such as she had never had before and it coated her tonsils with warmth, then, as it slipped further down a warmth and a seeming taste of burnt honey hit her. Her pupils widened and she tried to take a breath. She looked at Kevin then Hamish and tried to form words that would not come. She pointed to a chair and sat down as the warmth began to leave her. It was glorious she thought as the power of speech returned. "I have never tasted anything like that before, Hamish I am honoured that you have let me taste it." Milani stood and bent suddenly giving Hamish a peck on the cheek. She turned and looked at Kevin her eyes wide. "Can we have some?" she asked, her eyes promising something to him.

Hamish blushed a deep red as Milani kissed his cheek, "You're very welcome, I'm glad you liked it."

Kevin smiled at the scene, it was so like Milani to show grace to someone when she enjoyed their company. Looking at her he replied, "Yes we can" he said to her, and turning to Hamish he asked, "How much for a bottle Hamish?"

The big burly Scotsman turned to him and answered, "To you M'lord, it's free, a gift for you both from Maggie and myself for your patronage of our humble establishment."

Kevin grinned, "That's very kind of you, and very much appreciated Hamish, please thank Maggie for us as well."

"I will that your Grace, I certainly will that" Hamish replied.

"Oh, before I forget, the culling party returned with several deer, if you go up to the castle tomorrow you can have one of them for yourselves, curtesy of us" Kevin said.

"M'lord, that's more than gracious of you, we're most humbled and appreciative for your generosity" Hamish replied, bowing.

"Come on now Hamish, we've known each other since I was a laddie in short breeks, you and Maggie have always looked out for me and you've always been welcoming whenever I've come to the inn. it's the least I can do" Kevin said.

Hamish smiled at the praise from him, and turning to Milani he said, "Has he ever told you that Maggie used to put him over her knee if he talked back to her, it was quite the sight to see, but, it did instil manners into the little tyke."

Milani, who was feeling rather warm after her drink raised an eyebrow, "he still talks back Hamish" she said smiling, "but his manners are wonderful so Maggie taught him well." She put her arm through Kevin's. "shall we be going soon, I need to blow this drink out of me and," she whispered," I would like to be alone with you. We get little alone time as it is and Thunder is getting restless, I can feel him." she turned to wards Hamish and Maggie whose smiles were beaming. "Thank you both for your wonderful welcome, I am sure Lord Kilbane would be happy to welcome you to the hall one evening?" she looked at Kevin wondering if she had gone too far.

Turning to Milani, Kevin replied "What a great idea." Turning back to Hamish and Maggie he continued, "Just let us know when's best for yourselves and we'll set everything up. Of course, I insist that you bring some of your whisky..."

"I'd have been surprised if you hadn't asked us to!" Maggie laughed, then Hamish added, "We'd be honoured M'lord, M'Lady, thank you very much for asking us."

"One last thing, as much as I know the tradition is for you to use our formative titles, please just call us Kevin and Milani when it's just us" Kevin said.

"Of course M'lo...Kevin" Hamish answered, sounding very awkward.

"That's settled then" Kevin continued, "Well, we must take our leave of you both, the horses need a walk and 'we' need to clear our heads of this wonderful drink you've made."

Taking their leave of Hamish and Maggie, both he and Milani made their way out of the wooded area and through the inn and to their horses. "You know" he said to Milani, "Things have never felt more right than they are right now being here with you. Now, you said you wanted some alone time, did you have anything specific in mind?"

Milani let Thunder's bridle down so he could eat grass and felt the sun and breeze on her face albeit holodeck generated. Truth was she could stay in this fantasy forever It seemed more real to her than the Thall, than anything she had done in the intervening years since she had left Betazed. She looked at Kevin and smiled. I know this man, she thought as she took his hand in hers. She felt suddenly embarrassed feeling her cheeks flush. "Is it too soon for you?" she asked.

"Too soon?" Kevin asked, and then realised what Milani meant. "Ooooooh, well I...that is...it's not like I haven't...you know...that is if you think..." he stumbled out, his own cheeks now red in embarrassment.

Milani caressed his cheek gently and drew him to her Thunder trying to get between them, she pushed his nose away. "I just don't want to seem forward but I want you to make love to me, I think it's time..." she hesitated..."unless you do not want to?" she smiled. "I think it would be perfect here in our...your real home. Please..."

Kevin looked deep into Milani's eyes, "I would like to do nothing more than that my dearest Milani, but in my heart of hearts I know it's to soon. I want us to know each other more, better, deeper. Yes I know, we're linked together, but there's more to it than just mere feelings for me, I need to really know the person I'm going to give my heart to, to know they're my soul mate. I have deep desire for you my sweet, but I know if I give into 'just' that desire, I would hate myself afterwards because it would simply be a skin deep action on my part. I've shown you what my perfect world looks like, and I want us to be a part of that forever together, but I also want to know you, you're deepest thoughts and desires, to know you like I know myself and I think that will take us a little longer. Please don't hate me for saying this to you, but if you still wish to be with me, when I know the time is right, I will oh so gladly make love to you and I hope it will be the beginning of more magic between us. Does that make sense to you?" he asked, scared that Milani wouldn't understand him.

Milani looked at him and caressed his cheek. "I would wait an eternity for you my love and when it does happen we will both know the time is right. Come let us ride together through the heather up on the hill." She kissed him, the lightest feathery kiss on the lips, took Thunders reins in her hand and climbed on waiting for him. Companionably they rode in silence as Milani pressed Thunder nearer until she could take his hand. The heather was thick on the moor and the smell was thick. "I will never forget this day Kevin. The day we really found each other."

Kevin looked lovingly at Milani, "Neither will I my sweet, no matter what the distance may be between us physically, you'll always be a part of me forever."

As they held hands whilst they rode, he felt a contentment that he believed had been lost to him forever after what had happened between Shon and himself. The betrayal not only of her, but of the man he thought was his closest friend, Kerr. Now though, as much as he still couldn't find it within himself to forgive them both, he would be at a kind of peace thanks to Milani and her love and kindness towards him. Now, he could face Dex and Kerr and not want to kill them for the pain they put him through. True, he would still pay them both back for their treachery, but it wasn't upper most in his mind anymore, Milani was, and that's where she'd stay, his focus would be on her, making her happy, contented and loved.

"Shall we return to the castle my love, or do you still wish to keep on riding?" he asked her.

She took her hand away and reined Thunder in. He was tired of walking and wanted to run. "I think a visit to the castle would be perfect Kevin. She leant over to him whispering his ear "lets run!" she put her heels to Thunder and he leapt off happy to be going home. She lost her hat and her hair came loose flying out behind her. She urged him on more leaning forward and whispering into his ear, "lets beat the slow ones.!"

Kevin, knowing that his own dapple grey, 'Misty', was a few hands shorter than Milani's horse Thunder, knew they wouldn't be able to keep up with them, but they'd give as good as they could. He tapped his heels into Misty's flanks and she took off a fast pace, causing Kevin to re-adjust his seating in the saddle. As he couped down, he saw Milani's hat and he leaned down to the side and managed to grab it as they went past, but it didn't cause Misty to slow any. As he looked up, he could see Milani's hair flying out behind her as she galloped and it set his heart racing, she looked so beautiful at that moment that he found himself sitting up to get a better view. Misty swung her head to the side as she could feel the resistance it caused her when he sat up and Kevin said, "Sorry girl" and couped down again. As they reached the top of the rise, he saw Milani and Thunder far out ahead of them so he leaned into his horses ear and said "A few juicy apples are in it for you when we get back if you can catch up."

Misty seemed to increase her speed, and Kevin grinned at the fact they were now slowly gaining on the runaway racers in front of them. Before to long they were only yards behind them and Kevin laughed and called out, "We're coming Milani...we're catching you both!"

Milani laughed into the wind, she had never felt so free or so loved by the man catching up to Thunder's flank. For a moment she forgot about the harsh world behind, the Thall, the bounty hunters who were always on her tail, all forgotten. She reined Thunder in as she approached the stable yard the high castellated walls of the castle taking her breath away. "I could do this every day Kevin" she said as he appeared behind her. "I must look very dishevelled." She said. "I think I lost my hat somewhere."

Kevin smiled, "You could never look dishevelled Milani, even in the strongest of winds and rain you'd still look beautiful to me, and I think this is what you're looking for" he replied, handing her hat over. It was at that point that Harris appeared and Kevin said, "Good timing Harris, can you have Mrs Shepherd draw a bath for Lady Milani, and could you draw one for me please."

"Certainly your Grace" Harris replied, "but there's a pressing matter that I need to talk to you about, one that requires your urgent attention."

Kevin opened his mouth to reply, but then his COMM badge chirruped. "Computer, freeze programme" he said as a familiar voice came through, "Kerr to Kilbane, I need to see you on the bridge...if Milani's with you, ask her to come with you as well."

Tapping his COMM badge, Kevin replied, "We'll be with you shortly Commodore." He turned to Milani and said, "Well, it looks like we'll have to call it a day here just now, 'his nibs' must have our next mission. We can come back to this later when we've got some free time together."

With that he added, "Computer, save current programme as Kilbane and Milani then end programme.

==^==Programme saved==^==

The delights of Sanquhar castle dissolved around them and the bare metal walls of the holodeck appeared. As the doors opened to allow them to leave, he turned to Milani and said, "One day...one day we'll get to see the real thing, and you'll be more than happy I think."

Milani did not say anything just nodded swallowing her disappointment. "It all seems so real" she said.

After changing back into his uniform, Kevin met Milani and they both entered the turbolift that took them up to the bridge. Stepping out, he saw Finchley standing by his chair, reading the PaDD he had in his hands.

"You asked to see us Sir" Kevin said, "I take it you have the orders for our next mission?"

Finchley turned to him and said, "Actually no, believe it or not, we've been given shore leave. We've been on active duty for over eighteen months and the people that be think we need some rest and recuperation time. So, I thought we could head back to Earth, get a few weeks well earned rest, what do you think?"

Kevin looked from Finchley to Milani then back to Finchley again, "I think that's wonderful news...and not before time that they've decided to pull us from active duty so we can get some R and R."

"I agree" Finchley replied, "we head out in two hours, so if you have any business here, get it done now and we can get underway, dismissed."

Kevin grinned as he looked at Milani, "Looks like fate has come down on our side Milani, we can now go and see the real Sanquhar castle!"

Milani nodded, "Earth...are you sure?" she asked her face going white as she sat down. "I feel a little dizzy," she said by way of an excuse. "Err yes wonderful...excuse me I need to go to my quarters" she said wondering what awaited her there.